tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24708332064364276252024-03-19T05:46:44.255-05:00Closeted Bisexual Tamil GirlI’m Selvi, a bi teenage Tamil girl living in the USA. I am a debater, writer, and feminist. And oh, by the way, still in the closet. I’m here to share my thoughts, but mostly I'm just trying to figure life out.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04434219058539743013noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2470833206436427625.post-45951939804442546652013-11-27T20:08:00.000-06:002013-11-27T20:08:19.907-06:00My Mom Isn't Homophobic?!?One morning, as my mom walked into my room, I belatedly realized that I had left a copy of <u>Out & Equal at Work: From Closet to Corner Office</u> out on the floor in plain view. <i>Please don't notice, please don't notice</i>, I willed in my mind. But no such luck.<br>
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"Hey, what book is this?" She asked. My face started to heat up rapidly and my whole body was flushed with panic. Just one thought went through my head.<br>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1LblFWe_Ukujw8Wr8n2GyWVh0zS2G3yQRBLNrC8UO39ZijqVIO2bj4GkybgYN3qWIzgeI_MGXoQJlydefvcIKnX2dZImVgVVHRQ-zeb6ceNsdorwZ4RH16ImeufzNkl0sgpsrEjNWSdU/s1600/oh+shit+im+screwed.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1LblFWe_Ukujw8Wr8n2GyWVh0zS2G3yQRBLNrC8UO39ZijqVIO2bj4GkybgYN3qWIzgeI_MGXoQJlydefvcIKnX2dZImVgVVHRQ-zeb6ceNsdorwZ4RH16ImeufzNkl0sgpsrEjNWSdU/s1600/oh+shit+im+screwed.jpg" width="200"></a></div>
I kept my voice calm and indifferent when I replied "Oh, nothing Amma, just something Chyna gave me." Which, technically, was not untrue. Chyna is the simply amazing Advisor of my school's GSA. She's also an inspiring person and great friend, and my mom absolutely adores her. When I ordered the book, Chyna let me use her mailing address. So yes, I guess she <i>did</i> give it to me. Not that that little half-truth was going to get me out of the deep shit I knew I was in...</div>
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</div><a href="http://selviscloset.blogspot.com/2013/11/my-mom-isnt-homophobic.html#more">Read more »</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04434219058539743013noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2470833206436427625.post-16220113495494327912013-04-09T20:54:00.000-05:002013-04-09T21:12:07.652-05:00Why Me? Why Now?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I'll admit, it's not always easy trying to advocate for LGBT rights from deep within the closet. Being vice president of my school's GSA, I constantly put myself out there while holding back just enough, laughing things off, and sometimes having to say no. I keep secrets, and I feel the negative repercussions every day. It's in the confusion I feel when I tell my best friend I'm going to a GSA meeting, but can't tell her why. It's in the way I avoid my mom's gaze when I make up an excuse to go to an GSA lock-in, or when I hide the rainbow ribbons and LGBT books at the back of my shelf or the bottom of my backpack.<br />
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And sometimes I have to ask myself - <span style="text-align: center;">Why me? Why now?</span></div>
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I joined GSA and I started this blog because I couldn't handle my own silence. I felt as if I owed it to the community and to myself to do as much as I could.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFmiRcvyk5HXdLJA6D6V-UI7N6v15JibaNqw8GUJIT3qvEVZ6sE4mnXRaEtS5xIO-ihl1AoemVWqipcYWCKU7QkVW7kQks85UpixgFLv-ytfciPAh58dXoM1nMnGav9sDbL0tNAMpKSZM/s1600/alice+walker+activism.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFmiRcvyk5HXdLJA6D6V-UI7N6v15JibaNqw8GUJIT3qvEVZ6sE4mnXRaEtS5xIO-ihl1AoemVWqipcYWCKU7QkVW7kQks85UpixgFLv-ytfciPAh58dXoM1nMnGav9sDbL0tNAMpKSZM/s1600/alice+walker+activism.jpg" height="155" width="320" /></a></div>
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The LGBT movement will be the next great civil rights struggle that goes down in history. I am not willing
to be someone who holds back in fear, suppressing her beliefs because they are
not widely accepted. I am not content to speak only when the moment is opportune and
the fight is already won. I am not ashamed of my inner voice, no matter how
contested and inconvenient it might be. Someone once said, “Your beliefs don’t
make you a better person, your actions do”. If this is true, then what good is
a person who will not take action to defend their beliefs?</div>
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I will not be silent. I will do what I know needs to be
done… and I will hold my head high. We idealize revolutionaries, but when we
see them in society, why is our first instinct to quiet them, to reproach them
for disrupting the unwritten rules and keeping the norms from feeling too
comfortable? The world is changing around us, and this is not the time to afraid. All the
disapproving looks and scandalized whispers in the world will not deter me from
pursuing my dreams with sincere passion. I believe with all my heart, so I will
fight with all my strength.</div>
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<o:p></o:p>Why me? Because I simply cannot stand back and watch.</div>
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Why now? Because it simply cannot wait.</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04434219058539743013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2470833206436427625.post-58449511370508790662013-01-21T18:31:00.003-06:002013-11-27T15:40:50.139-06:00I am LOVING The New NormalI can't believe I only came across <a href="http://www.nbc.com/the-new-normal/" target="_blank">The New Normal</a> last week!! Welcome to my severe case of "Where have you been all my life?!?"-itis.<br>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_cFS2NXjvaxI5K-SAdxwtW9xHYL22jSy8NGu66d2579Z9vNQO5AxtTGgerUEZjrCGeGip2i64aZWt21HzO0YNTZEcyExX_U5qrX75SYQm4zuu7nA04ybLQ8yyE2ovrjf5fDhaZAszTp8/s1600/logo2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_cFS2NXjvaxI5K-SAdxwtW9xHYL22jSy8NGu66d2579Z9vNQO5AxtTGgerUEZjrCGeGip2i64aZWt21HzO0YNTZEcyExX_U5qrX75SYQm4zuu7nA04ybLQ8yyE2ovrjf5fDhaZAszTp8/s1600/logo2.jpg" height="181" title="The New Normal" width="320"></a></div>
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The show centers around a gay couple, Bryan and David, who are planning to have a baby. Meanwhile, Goldie is a single mom who moves from Ohio to California with her daughter Shania, and followed by her bigoted, ultra-conservative grandmother. When Goldie decides to become a surrogate, and gets paired up with Brian and David (add a little brilliant humor), a new kind of amazing family is born.<br>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Redefining the Family</span><br>
This show does an amazing job showing that no matter gay or straight, single or married, related by blood or not, love is what holds a family together. <br>
Or as Shania so eloquently puts it...<br>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXV3-iMnwsDtOFO5P5XAKLcr6aOfaaIiSmw60oNY9459DqeMRAcb_FWmKWwd7J3yZ59v6mHsBULmMcNX5rdlEazjXFXCtIc96luG3tfkTeKAL7pqSfR1J1ltwo21wbtWk7447fW5KV1Jc/s1600/family+vs+relatives.jpg" imageanchor="1"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXV3-iMnwsDtOFO5P5XAKLcr6aOfaaIiSmw60oNY9459DqeMRAcb_FWmKWwd7J3yZ59v6mHsBULmMcNX5rdlEazjXFXCtIc96luG3tfkTeKAL7pqSfR1J1ltwo21wbtWk7447fW5KV1Jc/s1600/family+vs+relatives.jpg" height="218" width="400"></a></div>
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The struggles that Bryan and David go through are just what every parent goes through when having their first child. Is it a boy or a girl? What were we hoping for? Who's going to stay at home? How are we going to provide a safe environment? It's personalized a little here and there to show the unique challenges that gay couples face, but the main picture is one of a supporting family trying to bring a new life into the world.<br>
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<a href="http://selviscloset.blogspot.com/2013/01/i-am-loving-new-normal.html#more">Read more »</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04434219058539743013noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2470833206436427625.post-4743143120717136092012-11-27T22:33:00.003-06:002013-09-08T19:09:30.174-05:00Self-Acceptance<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The season of presents is just around the corner. Have you given yourself this important gift?</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3HOozxYWPlCQEVBqHgylT7XW_MH6dOZ7I2LLvqypa5tbDHsTyonvmqnj4PojqJ4QSFND7tDiOtdPyRmZbjCbPDU9kDHSkmzO_xCq_qfPpgzUphRs24wVP4hL0iOplKmsCW4nkiEaVAKg/s1600/self-acceptance+2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3HOozxYWPlCQEVBqHgylT7XW_MH6dOZ7I2LLvqypa5tbDHsTyonvmqnj4PojqJ4QSFND7tDiOtdPyRmZbjCbPDU9kDHSkmzO_xCq_qfPpgzUphRs24wVP4hL0iOplKmsCW4nkiEaVAKg/s1600/self-acceptance+2.jpg" height="421" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Whoever you are, remember you are beautiful!!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Selvi <3</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04434219058539743013noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2470833206436427625.post-4115830213113649462012-11-07T22:12:00.000-06:002013-09-08T19:12:53.201-05:002012 Election Victory for the LGBT movement!<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 18px;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Last night, historic victories were achieved and voters overcame <a href="http://www.hrc.org/blog/entry/video-a-historic-night-for-the-lgbt-movement" target="_blank">huge milestones</a> in civil rights and equality. For the LGBT community, this year's election has been an occasion worth celebrating.</span></span><br>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5Vh1DtvaknJ2nWeMdr29dwcv0lAqsmWxyzZazzbXVfwu-y2JvyWxG78cvpgvhkZfahGJbd-rd8ox8xsP0t3ni6vrdTpbMPqnXj2Ts4nNvCjBpdBmK52HED4aZxvQN92SnPtq5nsn48tE/s1600/support.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5Vh1DtvaknJ2nWeMdr29dwcv0lAqsmWxyzZazzbXVfwu-y2JvyWxG78cvpgvhkZfahGJbd-rd8ox8xsP0t3ni6vrdTpbMPqnXj2Ts4nNvCjBpdBmK52HED4aZxvQN92SnPtq5nsn48tE/s1600/support.png" height="39" width="320"></a></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">Barack Obama, the president who repealed Don't Ask Don't Tell, and the first sitting president </span><b style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">ever</b><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"> to openly support same-sex marriage was decisively re-elected for a second term!</span><br>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoWm4BZHgdmHl_HQWLV1We-js8ucibFHxTXto1DQd0i6yC9VgGiyw2aNetEEyUKxusUxQNE78rcH5EeH0hF91PQYahZeAOhPAI5yWKrV3PX7LjV548ylsH1to8fgoqcakcsX1rNU6mCd4/s1600/obama+lgbt.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoWm4BZHgdmHl_HQWLV1We-js8ucibFHxTXto1DQd0i6yC9VgGiyw2aNetEEyUKxusUxQNE78rcH5EeH0hF91PQYahZeAOhPAI5yWKrV3PX7LjV548ylsH1to8fgoqcakcsX1rNU6mCd4/s1600/obama+lgbt.jpg" height="215" width="400"></a></div>
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">Congratulations</span><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"> Mr.President! I am personally relieved knowing that the president of my country will support and fight for my rights.</span><br>
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">It's important to note that President Obama's reelection was carried largely by </span><a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/11/07/gender-gap-2012-election-obama_n_2086004.html" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;" target="_blank">Women</a><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">, </span><a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/11/07/latino-voters-election-2012_n_2085922.html" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;" target="_blank">Latino</a><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">, African-American, and LGBT voters, sending the GOP a clear message that they </span><i style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">cannot</i><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"> continue to ignore and degrade women and minorities.</span><br>
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;"><br></span></span>
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">Tammy Baldwin was elected from Wisconsin, making history as the </span></span><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">FIRST openly LGBT Senator in the United States!</span><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"> She also became Wisconsin's first woman Senator. Alongside her, <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/11/07/tammy-baldwin-election-lgbt-candidates_n_2089103.html#slide=1732945" target="_blank">12 other LGBT candidates</a> were triumphant.</span><br>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTSq8PNp3MCBgy2zCZ20dCVHg2y0hRdnN8STqcWjAvOEj7cAupJuKmTWOO8_jWYWWnkvwDaJTuHY73oAl3A4jItT-M-I-EkZG-FJpsPWVRJIVZynEW6dHPVRniWvnsyOp8Id-CKVYaP3c/s1600/tammy+baldwin.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTSq8PNp3MCBgy2zCZ20dCVHg2y0hRdnN8STqcWjAvOEj7cAupJuKmTWOO8_jWYWWnkvwDaJTuHY73oAl3A4jItT-M-I-EkZG-FJpsPWVRJIVZynEW6dHPVRniWvnsyOp8Id-CKVYaP3c/s1600/tammy+baldwin.jpg" height="200" width="200"></a></div>
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<a href="http://selviscloset.blogspot.com/2012/11/2012-election-victory-for-lgbt-movement.html#more">Read more »</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04434219058539743013noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2470833206436427625.post-86476174695408391572012-10-11T22:18:00.002-05:002013-11-10T21:20:17.716-06:00Interested In<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Today, I went on facebook and changed something. Nobody else would have noticed, but the little difference is huge to me.</span><br>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1AvO2DjINvIdPwpRvecqSZYpYg7KKqOdIkBI_ObdtWreB7LBIchMiqB5-YvAfhq-IkA725L3SP4D5evs7FDN97WgGQsNGtwldoInxyvCgkTvfMwd8PE-8Ad_RsDv61Q13Y8Vc7HiWbg0/s1600/rainbowfb.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1AvO2DjINvIdPwpRvecqSZYpYg7KKqOdIkBI_ObdtWreB7LBIchMiqB5-YvAfhq-IkA725L3SP4D5evs7FDN97WgGQsNGtwldoInxyvCgkTvfMwd8PE-8Ad_RsDv61Q13Y8Vc7HiWbg0/s1600/rainbowfb.jpg"></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I clicked on <i>Update Info</i> on my timeline. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>Basic Info. </i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>Edit</i>. </span></div>
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<a href="http://selviscloset.blogspot.com/2012/10/interested-in.html#more">Read more »</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04434219058539743013noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2470833206436427625.post-91852957538119285482012-09-28T20:21:00.001-05:002013-09-08T19:06:25.965-05:00Joining Gay-Straight Alliance<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I finally joined my school's Gay-Straight Alliance!!</span><br>
<span style="font-family: Arial;"></span><br>
<span style="font-family: Arial;">I went in looking for some understanding, wanting to meet new people, and generally expecting to sit back for the ride.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: Arial;"></span><br>
<span style="font-family: Arial;">What I actually found at the meeting was 5 members, 1 teacher-sponsor, 1 advisor, and a box of cinnamon rolls. The group was small, but hey, at least it was there! My friend Chyna, who I'd talked to before joining, was the unspoken leader and driving force. Her obvious passion and dedication to the cause made me want to do more. Our GSA could use some fresh ideas and motivation, so I decided to help light the fire.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: Arial;"></span><br>
<span style="font-family: Arial;">GSAs have 3 main purposes: </span><br>
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<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Provide <strong>Support</strong> and acceptance for LGBTQ teens struggling with their sexual orientation or gender identity. Establish </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">a place where LGBTQ and straight ally students can comfortably discuss issues that matter to them. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Take initiative to <strong>Educate</strong> the </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">school community, combat hostility, and transform schools into accepting and friendly environments</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Empower and mobilize youth LGBT and allies to <strong>Advocate</strong> for LGBTQ rights and issues in the broader community</span></li>
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<a href="http://selviscloset.blogspot.com/2012/09/joining-gay-straight-alliance.html#more">Read more »</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04434219058539743013noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2470833206436427625.post-62242878635659759972012-09-17T18:52:00.000-05:002017-12-30T13:25:26.321-06:00How I would turn my parents into ex-homophobes<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">My family was watching Obama Revealed on CNN a few nights ago when Don't Ask Don't Tell was mentioned.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "arial";"></span><br>
<span style="font-family: "arial";">My dad: This is what's wrong with America today.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "arial";"></span><br>
<span style="font-family: "arial";">I immediately perked up. I had heard it as "The oppression of the LGBT community is what's wrong with America today". Had he somehow miraculously radically changed his views?? (Yes, sad how much I want it to be true)</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "arial";"></span><br>
<span style="font-family: "arial";">Me: What's wrong? (nonchalantly)</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "arial";"></span><br>
<span style="font-family: "arial";">My dad: Those people (I don't think he'll ever say the word gay, I don't know if he even knows the term LGBT). Democrats are wrong about them. That's what happens when people become too liberal.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "arial";"></span><br>
<span style="font-family: "arial";">My heart sank. Yeah, no miracle change there. I wonder what in the world he would do if he found out his daughter was one of "those people"?</span><br>
<br>
<a href="http://selviscloset.blogspot.com/2012/09/how-i-would-turn-my-parents-into-ex.html#more">Read more »</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04434219058539743013noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2470833206436427625.post-73125852507071837862012-09-09T12:45:00.000-05:002012-10-06T12:23:34.624-05:00Challenges of Accepting the Bisexual Label<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Presently, I’m 100% comfortable identifying as bisexual, but
during time when I was questioning, accepting who I am was an uphill battle. I
constantly rejected the bisexual label, even though it technically fit what I
felt. Why was it so difficult to come to terms with?</span><br>
<span style="font-family: Arial;"></span><br>
<br>
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">
</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><strong>1) “I am [insert weird label that separates me from normal
people]”</strong></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It would be a lot easier to just say “I’m attracted to boys”
or “I’m attracted to girls” or in my case “I’m attracted to boys and girls”. There
was no hiding that from myself, and no reason to anyway.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>These phrases identify feelings, which
start within and can’t really be controlled.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But for some reason, the words to describe who we “are” are
what people tend to focus on. Straight. Gay. Lesbian. Bi. Society always finds
it easier to put people in groups and differentiate them than to really give
individual worth to their feelings.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br>
</div><a href="http://selviscloset.blogspot.com/2012/09/challenges-of-accepting-bisexual-label.html#more">Read more »</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04434219058539743013noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2470833206436427625.post-80706290408927479562012-09-07T13:37:00.002-05:002017-12-30T14:04:47.513-06:00My Story<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I didn’t always know I was bisexual, but now I know that I
always have been. This account is brutally honest, detailed, and offers no
excuses, sugar-coating, or romanticizing. It may make you uncomfortable. It's also a bit long. Names and places have been changed or left out to protect the
identities of the innocent ;)<o:p></o:p></span><br>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">
</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"></span><br>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>4 years old:</b></span></span><br>
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">After my brother was born in the US, we went back to India
for a while. I got sent to a small village school for LKG (Lower Kindergarten).
There was a girl I met there whose name I forgot. I liked her instantly. At the
time, I compulsively wanted to be friends with her. Can you even have a crush
on someone at such a young age? I guess I did. All I remember is that her mom
eventually told me to leave her alone.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">
</span><br>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Kindergarten:</b></span></span><br>
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">I was 5 when I started Kindergarten at my first elementary
school. I met a girl named Callie and we became really close, best friends. We
did almost everything together. Later in the year, she also became friends with
Nikki and Chantel. I was rather jealous. I don’t know what I was thinking back
then, but I really liked her and I didn’t want to share. At the end of the
year, she moved away.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">During Kindergarten, I also got to know the boys my age
living in my apartment complex. I never went through a “boys have cooties,
eawwww” phase because 1) I had a brother and 2) most of my friends were boys at the time. There weren’t many
girls my age in the area.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>1<sup>st</sup> grade:</b><o:p></o:p></span></span><br>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">
</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I was talking to Madeline Easton when she mentioned
excitedly that her crush was coming to our school. I didn’t understand what she
meant, so I asked “what’s Crush?” and she, after a few unsuccessful attempts,
explained it to me in a way I still didn’t understand, something about liking a
boy.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">Later, I developed a “crush” on one of my best friends, Jayan. He
was perhaps the most annoying person ever to cross my life at the time. He was better than me at
everything, a complete perfectionist, and constantly tattling about me to our teacher Ms. Raines
and getting me in trouble. He should have been infuriating; after all we were
just kids. But still I was crazy about him in an awkward little
girl way.</span><br>
<br>
<br>
<b style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">2<sup>nd</sup> grade:</b><br>
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">I noticed Kate Neuman the moment I walked into my classroom
on the first day. I had to sit next to her. I’d seen her around before, and now
I finally knew her name. I don’t know what made me say “I’ve always wanted to
meet you” but I did. I didn’t see anything wrong, I was just being friendly.
She frowned like I was crazy, and my smile faltered. Then came the teasing and
bullying. Those girls’ faces on the playground leering at me in my mind,
taunting “Do you like Kate? Do you like Kate?” No. I hated her. I became
explosively insecure. I got into a ton of trouble. I hated the girl who’d made
my life hell. And then we moved.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">We still lived in the same city, but we moved from an
apartment into a house. At my new school, I was still alone and ostracized, for
whatever reason. It was no better.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">That summer, my mom, my brother, and I went up to the school
to spend the day at the playground. We saw some girls playing lacrosse in the
field so we sat down on the bench to watch. Another girl joined us after a
while. She was fair with light blonde short hair and could have been in or just
out of high school. I instantly found myself being pulled to her. We talked to
her for a while, and she pointed out her friend/sister/cousin who was playing
in the field. She left to go to work, and I left wondering why I felt a little
goofy.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">
</span><br>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"></span></span><br>
</div><a href="http://selviscloset.blogspot.com/2012/09/my-story.html#more">Read more »</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04434219058539743013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2470833206436427625.post-56352184898993809662012-09-07T12:28:00.001-05:002017-12-15T11:34:16.706-06:00Who I Am: Introducing Closeted Bisexual Tamil Girl<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Greetings from the closet! I’m Selvi, a queer teenage Tamil girl living in the USA. I’m here to give a personal account of my experiences and share my thoughts and feelings. I am a lot of different things and proud of my identity, but mostly I’m just human and trying to figure life out.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial";"></span> </div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><strong><br /></strong></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><strong>LGBTQIA<o:p></o:p></strong></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">LGBTQIA stands for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Questioning, Intersex, Allies, etc.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Those of us who fall under the spectrum of Gender and Sexual Minority are coming more to the spotlight. Same-sex marriage is now a hot-button issue. We have haters and supporters and everything in between. That’s why it’s our job to make ourselves more and more visible, to make sure we can’t be ignored or overlooked. <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Love is love unconditionally, whether it’s how you love other people (sexuality) or how you love yourself (gender identity).</b> I’m here to promote love. Let’s show the world why they should love us too!</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "arial";"></span> <br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><strong><br /></strong></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><strong>Tamil/Indian<o:p></o:p></strong></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I’m putting these two together because they’re cultural aspects. (If you don’t know, Tamil is a language spoken in parts of Asia, also a cultural identity. Tamil Nadu is a Tamil-speaking state in India)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I am passionate about my culture. I speak, read, and write Tamil, go to Tamil Sangams, India association, NSF, FeTNA conventions, etc and so on. It is pretty awesome being part of the Tamil and Indian communities. But the thing is, we are extremely traditional. Indian society in general tends to resist social change. Do you know how many Indian LGBT there in social media? Not a lot. And Tamil LGBT? They’re practically nonexistent! I</span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> know there are more of us out there.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Indian LGBT have to deal with the fact that the LGBT movement is very western. All the music, films, pride and support groups are English/Caucasian-based. As Indians/Tamils, It is HARD to reconcile our culture with our sexual orientation. So we need to be there for each other and build some communities of our own. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><strong>A Girl<o:p></o:p></strong></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">It’s a fact - gay guys get more attention than lesbians and there are way more resources for bisexual guys than biseuxal girls. Thanks to popular male-dominated media, lesbian and bi women have been <a href="http://radicalbi.wordpress.com/2012/04/25/hot-sexy-bi-babes-media-depictions-of-bisexual-women/#more-532" target="_blank">fetishized and objectified</a>, and this leads to downright disrespect for the validity of our identities. As a strong feminist, I object to society's definition of me. Respect has to start within, and hopefully people will see that and start to give us the respect we deserve.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial";"></span> </div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><strong>Teenage<o:p></o:p></strong></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Being young and different can be scary. The suicide rate in teenage LGBT is high. Most of us still live with our parents, and maybe (like mine), they're homophobic. Since our experiences are different than adults, our opinions matter too. We’re still growing and developing, and most of us haven’t fallen in love yet... Some of us still need to fall in love with ourselves.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><strong>Still in the closet<o:p></o:p></strong></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">There is always this pressure on LGBT people to "come out". But really, I am fine where I am. I'm not looking for a relationship at the time and don’t plan to until college<strong>. </strong>Being in the closet doesn’t mean that I’m ashamed. I am comfortable with who I am. I’m just under complex circumstances and don’t really feel the need to come out yet. Simple as that. This blog is my way to put my thoughts and support out there without putting myself out there just yet.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">So there you have it. This is who I am. These are the things I’ll be writing about. If any of that struck a chord with you, we need to talk. I want to hear what you think! Comment, email, let me know.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"></span><br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">All my love,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Selvi <3</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";"><a href="mailto:selvi.malar.bi@gmail.com"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">selvi.malar.bi@gmail.com</span></a></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04434219058539743013noreply@blogger.com4